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Author Topic: John and Elaine  (Read 23749 times)
jm_walktall
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« on: December 31, 2010, 11:28:13 am »

The latest news on John and Elaine appears to be that they are indeed splitting up after 20 years.

According to John's publicist..."John and Elaine Mellencamp are proud of their 20 years together and are very happy with their accomplishments both as parents and as a family," the couple's representative said in a statement issued Thursday. "They will continue to raise their two children in Indiana but have decided to call it a day as a couple."

news links:

http://www.upi.com/Entertainment_News/Music/2010/12/31/John-and-Elaine-Mellencamp-split-up/UPI-43581293783300/
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20101231/people_nm/us_mellencamp
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20101231/ap_en_mu/us_people_john_mellencamp

I know that this news is devastating to us all. I hope that, as we have always done as fans of John Mellencamp, that we give this news, and John and Elaine, the respect and support they deserve. Our hopes have always been, and always will be, for John, Elaine, and their family, to be happy in their lives together. Whatever the circumstances and reasons, the Mellencamp's are redefining their lives and their happiness. I know I can speak for all of us when I say that I hope the process is one of grace, love, respect, forgiveness, and in the end, a new found happiness for the entire family. You have our support; our thoughts are with you.
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"If you want change, it starts with  you" John Mellencamp
petenkaren
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« Reply #1 on: December 31, 2010, 11:43:41 am »

I hope this is the forum to share our reactions, even if some disapprove.

I am personally shocked.  They always seem to be so happy together.  Neither one of them needed anything from the other.  I know that Elaine brought out the best in John.  He was a much different person from 1991 on.  I won't give her all the credit.  A heart attack and life experiences through aging certainly have a lot to do with that as well.  However, she was there for all of it.

I sure hope this is as mutual as it sounds now.  I also hope that John does not lose his creative edge and desire to record.  The boys are older, but divorce sucks no matter what age you are.  It would be awesome if they truly intend to stay nearby in Indiana to finish what they started in raising 2 fine boys.

I wish John, Elaine and the boys all the best. 
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It sure would feel good to feel good again, Oh My Sweet Love...
WildNight
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« Reply #2 on: December 31, 2010, 02:55:10 pm »

I wish them all the best, especially the kids its not fair to them. I dont know the circumstances but the marriage obviously wasnt working anymore.  What I find is sad is the fact John always jokes about how the "family doesnt like him much anyways" he said it recently on Letterman.  If your having family issues you dont joke about things like that unless your a little messed up in the head.  I love Johns music but I think we all know he is not a role model.  Elaine deserves better then a grumpy old man who is basically waiting to die. I still like Mellencamp and think hes a good person and has amazing music, hes just a strange individual which im sure fuels his creative side. 
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tattudemellenhead
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« Reply #3 on: December 31, 2010, 03:58:39 pm »

Everyone has a different way of dealing with things and maybe for John to joke about it, well, that is his way of getting through it. Although, I am a little confused on your words WILDNIGHT......you say you still like Mellencamp and wish them all the best but you have said some mean things in your post. Why isn't he a role model? And you refer to him as a grumpy old man who is waiting to die?Huh?? For real??  That is what you see??? If this split didn't happen, did you feel like this before, like Elaine deserved something better??  Wow, we all perceive things differently I guess. I disagree whole heartedly, right down to saying he is a strange individual.
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slm1206
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« Reply #4 on: December 31, 2010, 04:20:47 pm »

This does not shock me at all. I was at the Nasville concert very close to the stage, he had some very strong interaction with a girl that he later  pulled up on the stage. I had been to several concerts before and saw him interact with his fans, but not like this. I actually came home and goggled about John and Elaine spliting up because the interaction didn't feel right to me. 
But as far as his marriage goes, I somewhat understand their splitting. I have been married 30 years to a man 10 years older than I am. Yes, I do totally understand how people just grow and have different perspectives on things at different times in their lives. As you get older it seems the age gap widens. I just wish each of them all the best.
I certainly do not not see John as an old man waiting to die. He is my favorite artist and always will be. Best Wishes, John and Elaine
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adojamesjess
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« Reply #5 on: December 31, 2010, 04:35:44 pm »

wonder what lyrics he'll put in when he sings "small town'.........
« Last Edit: January 02, 2011, 08:08:21 pm by adojamesjess » Logged
WildNight
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« Reply #6 on: December 31, 2010, 08:10:00 pm »

It's just my frustration talking, I just feel like his cocky/grumpy/sarcastic attitude we all find funny in his interviews spills into his home life.  I know this doesn't seem fair to speculate but his track record in relationships isn't very good. I'm sure john has a good heart and wouldn't hurt a fly, but he always has that attitude that leads me to believe it may have had something to do with the breakup. This is just my opinion I'm sorry if it offends anyone.
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WildNight
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« Reply #7 on: December 31, 2010, 08:18:16 pm »

I'll leave it at this, its sad to see the relationship that made john a better person over with, I wish him the best of luck finding what makes him happy
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fourloops
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« Reply #8 on: December 31, 2010, 09:07:35 pm »

 Sad

It was way beyond stunning to hear this news.  I am so sad for all involved because it had to be a very difficult decision.  It always seemed that John and Elaine had a very solid, stable relationship and that Elaine's calm reserve did in fact "center" John.  I just wish they could work this out and find the passion they once had.  I worry that John may go off the rails like he did with his second divorce and let us all hope and pray that this "split" will not lead to that result.  John has previously said in interviews that Elaine was not real crazy about all his touring and she did probably manage to curtail the duration somewhat.  And now with 2 teenage boys - that is not easy and bound to create a lot of conflicts.  His comment on Letterman I didn't think a lot about the first time because John is pretty self-effacing but now I do wonder.  His crazy schedule in 2010-2011 which led to the box set, No Better Than This, the musical with Stephen King and the unrelentless tour schedule probably did take its toll on the relationship.  John loves all of this but maybe he should refocus on the boys and maybe Elaine.  It is just way too sad to think this is happening.  I sure do hope and pray that maybe this "separation" is only that and they find their way back to each other.

To sad to contemplate right now.

jcooprx
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selena
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« Reply #9 on: January 01, 2011, 09:29:35 am »

Like everyone else, I am sad to see the end of what appeared to be a great partnership.  As a fan, I was grateful for John's continued energy and amazing creative output in 2010 (two albums, two tours, several special performances). Yet it seems it was also a year in which he suffered great loss in his personal life.  In addition to his separation from Elaine, John mentioned on the NPR World Cafe program that his good friend Mark Ripley had died in October. 

John always seems stoic and realistic about change and death ("know that dying's as natural as birth, and our troubles here don't last long") but I can only imagine that there is profound sadness lurking behind the jocular exterior we saw recently on Letterman. I hope that John will find the same comfort and peace that his music has provided to so many of us over the years.
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mitch1982
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« Reply #10 on: January 01, 2011, 06:43:02 pm »

Wow is all I can say.  I too noticed the absence of certain pieces of jewelry when John was on David Letterman, funny how you do that!

Don't know what else to say right now.  Thoughts are out to John, Elaine and all the kids.

Spotted this article today:
http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20454251,00.html
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hoffman1611
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« Reply #11 on: January 02, 2011, 02:37:46 am »

I Love John Mellencamp because he writes songs that relate and inspire me as a writer. I also think he is one of the only genuine musicians and people on this earth. His music has gotten me through some really tough times that include losing my grandmother to cancer, a terrible breakup with a girl, and family issues. I wish you pure happiness Mr. Mellencamp and your kids and Elaine. Let's respect his privacy and not intervene in his personal life with our assumptions. Thank you for all of your music and knowledge.
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mellenq
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« Reply #12 on: January 02, 2011, 08:25:35 am »

. Let's respect his privacy and not intervene in his personal life with our assumptions.


I totally agree. It is not our place to speculate on what has or has not happened.  Basically, other than to wish the whole family best wishes, it is none of our business.
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only promises I know to be true, are the promises made from the heart. ~MQDU~
zoie1964z
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« Reply #13 on: January 02, 2011, 09:11:47 am »

Everyone has a different way of dealing with things and maybe for John to joke about it, well, that is his way of getting through it. Although, I am a little confused on your words WILDNIGHT......you say you still like Mellencamp and wish them all the best but you have said some mean things in your post. Why isn't he a role model? And you refer to him as a grumpy old man who is waiting to die?Huh?? For real??  That is what you see??? If this split didn't happen, did you feel like this before, like Elaine deserved something better??  Wow, we all perceive things differently I guess. I disagree whole heartedly, right down to saying he is a strange individual.
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zoie1964z
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« Reply #14 on: January 02, 2011, 09:20:27 am »

Referring back to the post that said John was a grumpy old man, first you have to realize that Elaine is much younger than John and maybe she should have thought about that before she married him.  With John just turning 59 and going on tour, I had the pleasure of seeing him in Kansas City and absolutely loved the show, he talked more to the audience like I had never seen him do much before. If you listen to the lyrics in "Clumsy Old World" you can tell that there are problems, and "dont forget about me", is one of my favorites.  So, I suggest you listen to the CD if you dont have it.  As far as his family goes, I think he was talking about his extended family as well, like a brother he mentions in a song that he hasnt seen in 6-7 years.  So before you go calling him a grumpy old man, there are 2 sides to the story.  John is a Libra, they are perfectionists, and if you think thats grumpy, then you need to focus your negative comments about him somewhere else.  No matter what happens, as I do not know John personally, I will always give him my support, hes the only artist I believe in and have for 30 years now. 
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